Family, Personality, and Mate Selection: Exploring Discrepancies Between Young Adults’ and Parents’ Preferences

Mate preferences are influenced by a complex interplay of individual characteristics, cultural norms, and family expectations. This study explores the discrepancies between young adults’ and their parents’ preferences in mate selection, with a particular focus on the role of family allocentrism and Big-5 personality traits. Conducted in Kerala, India, a culturally collectivist context, this research compares the ideal partner preferences of young adults with their perceptions of their parents’ preferences. It was hypothesized that young adults’ mate preferences would differ significantly from their perceptions of parental preferences, that there would be significant gender differences in mate preferences of young adults, that higher levels of family allocentrism would lead to a closer alignment between young adults’ preferences and their parents’ preferences and that personality traits would be associated with greater differences between young adults’ and parental mate preferences. Using a sample of 300 college students, the study investigates three key dimensions of mate selection: warmth-trustworthiness, vitality-attractiveness, and status-resources. Data were gathered through well-established scales, including the Ideal Partner Scale, Family Allocentrism Scale, and Big Five Inventory-2 Short Form. Paired t-tests, independent t-tests, and Pearson’s correlation analysis were used to test the hypotheses. The results reveal significant differences in the preferences of young adults and their parents, with young adults prioritizing warmth-trustworthiness and vitality-attractiveness, while parents emphasize status-resources. Family allocentrism and personality traits, such as neuroticism and agreeableness, significantly influenced these discrepancies, with individuals higher in family allocentrism aligning more closely with parental expectations. Females consider status-resources as ideal partner characteristics more than males. The findings highlight the role of cultural and familial factors in shaping mate preferences, demonstrating the complexity of mate selection in collectivist societies. This research contributes to the understanding of intergenerational dynamics in mate preferences and the impact of personality traits in navigating these differences.